At Audiotuts+ we irregularly put up a reader track for workshopping and critique (find out how to submit a track). This is how it works: you upload your song, and every week or so we’ll publish one here and step away from the podium. The floor is yours to talk about the track and how the artist can fix problems in and improve upon the mix and the song.
This track has been submitted for your friendly, constructive criticism. They have put their track (and their heart and soul) in your hands to learn and get useful feedback.
- Do you enjoy the song or track itself? Does it have potential?
- Can the arrangement be improved?
- How did you find the mix? What would you do differently?
- What do you enjoy about the rhythm track? What can be done to improve it?
- Is the choice of instruments relevant and effective for the style/song?
- Are the lyrics (if any) effective? Does the style, arrangement and genre of the song suit them?
- Can you suggest any specific techniques that might improve the track?
- Do you have any other constructive feedback?
The Party by Delta City
Artist’s website: olafsmetalface.blogspot.com
Description of the track:
A funky house track that’s in the workings. Would love to get some feedback. My first full song produced in Logic. It’s not mastered and barely mixed.
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Terms of Use: Streaming only. No download.
Have a listen to the track and offer your constructive criticism for this Workshop in the comments section.
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Do you enjoy the song or track itself? Does it have potential?
I like the beginning. I think the track has potential. Too much trumpet. I would bring the trumpet slowly, piece by pieces. It takes too much of the track, too imposing.
Can the arrangement be improved?
Yes.
What do you enjoy about the rhythm track? What can be done to improve it?
Like the beat. The kick is a little too hard (almost feel like it’s doubled).
Is the choice of instruments relevant and effective for the style/song?
Yes but too much of the trumpet, too repetitive i think.
Can you suggest any specific techniques that might improve the track?
Try gating the trumpet with a sidechain.
Maybe a synth.
I really like this track. The trumpets do get a bit much at times but its still great. The song sounds very clean especially considering that it has not mastered. The bottom and top end of the track seem rich but I feel like there is alot of empty space in the middle frequencies of the song. Maybe you did this on purpose so you could add vocals, I dont know but I think some pads and strings would really fill out the track in a good way.
I think this is a good start. It has a good groove and most of the parts that are there work well together.
I think this song REALLY needs a B section and possibly even a C section. I think you are trying to achieve that through various rhythms and instrumentation on top of the groove, but it is both rhythmically and harmonically monotonous. Without changing the underlying harmony, it really just amounts to “riffing” on a music bed.
I think you need to change the bass riff up and hop onto a different chord for your B section. I would even mix it up yet again for a C section.
I also don’t think the synth part really works. You’re taking a feature instrument and making it part of the rhythm section, which confuses its function to me. It’s all up in your face, yet it is repeating this short rhythmic passage over and over. If you are going to use it, I would make it a little more melodic. Otherwise, I would change the patch a bit and push it back in the mix.
Like I said, I like the feel of it. I just don’t think it carries the length of the song very well in it’s current form.
thanks alot guys! this was my first track and i’ve been working a lot since. learning tons. I appreciate the feedback. can you explain “gating the trumpet with a sidechain”. haven’t tackled side-chaining yet.
cheers
Yes I like the track and I do think that the track has potential,
the arrangement can be approved. Everyone seems to say that the trumpet is too much, but I don’t think that’s it at all. I think you need more trumpet. A section of trumpets, or a brass section, with some different melodic lines to add variety. Why not some saxophones? Possibly record a real trumpet if you can. If you only want the single trumpet though, I would try using delay designer, and pan the delay(s) so that it feels like it is spread out. Maybe some space designer too, if you haven’t already?
Also, why is the default little picture a man?
good point lady logic!